Sonder
The realization that every passing stranger has an inner life as complex as your own.
Sonder is a newer term, coined by John Koenig in his project "The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows." The word describes the sudden realization that every person you catch a glimpse of—the woman on the bus, the man behind the cash register—has their own memories, worries, relationships, and dreams, just as rich as your own. It is not an established word in traditional dictionaries, but it has spread because it describes a feeling many have experienced without being able to name.
You're sitting on a train, looking out the window. A car passes by. The driver has just argued with their partner, is thinking about their mother's illness, and is planning a trip you will never know anything about. In a second, your world becomes just one of billions of ongoing worlds.
Being able to name a feeling makes it easier to reflect on. Sonder is a great example of how words shape our experiences.
Sonder is not an established Swedish or English word in an academic sense—it is a neologism from an art project.
Next time you're standing in line, pick a stranger and briefly imagine what they might have been through today.
Everyone you see is the main character in their own life.
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